Akpos The Joker 2

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Scene 1:

 Akpos The Joker 2

A Pastor baptised Akpos and dipped his head in water 3 times; as he did so, he said:

Pastor: You are baptised. You are a new creation, old things have passed away. No more alcoholic beverages for you. Your new name is Jacob.

Jacob headed back home and hit the refrigerator. He took a bottle of Harp Lager beer, dipped it in water 3 times and said:

Apkos/Jacob: You are now a new creation, old things have passed away. Behold, you are now Orange juice!

He then proceeded to take a huge gulp- Jacob is drinking Orange juice.

Scene 2:

Akpos is hurrying to the Exam Hall. He has a Plumber in tow.

Examiner: Akpos! Why did you bring a Plumber to the Exam Hall?

Akpos: [Genuinely perplexed] Sir! I heard the exam questions were leaking. Should I have brought a Mason too?

Scene 3:

Its Akpos’s birthday. His course mate sends him a birthday text message.

Course Mate: HBD Dude. LLNP, TTYL.

Akpos: [Enraged, replies] what is the meaning of all these silly abbreviations?

Course Mate: [Texting] ah! Bush man! HBD-Happy Birthday; LLNP-Long Life and Prosperity; TTYL- Talk to You Later!

Akpos: Types ‘TFYT’ and fires off another text message.

Course Mate: [Calls] what does TFYT mean nah?

Akpos: [In gales of laughter] oh! You don’t know what it means bah? TFYT= Thunder Fire You There!!!

Scene 4:

 

Teacher: Amaka, what’s your future ambition?

Amaka: I am going to be a multi-billionaire business woman.

Teacher: That is amazing. Akpos, you?

Akpos: I am going to be Amaka’s husband.

Say WHAAAAAt!!!

© 2012 – 2017, Jennifer Nkem-Eneanya. All rights reserved.

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5 Things You Didn't Know About Jennifer in 2015: 1. Her newest collection of short stories, 'The Curious Case of the Small Pikin & Other Stories' is available on okadabooks.com 2. She ported from Blogger to WordPress and shares her uncensored thoughts on jennyuncensored.wordpress.com 3. She is an aspiring Filmmaker & Talk-show Host[ess] 4. She's a mother of two, wife of one and daughter of God. 5. She plans to travel around the world in less than 80 days... Now you Know! Find me on Twitter: @jennynkem

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